Hello-hello! My name is Simon I'm twenty-one years old. As you will see, my story turned out to be well, somewhat... scandalous. A while ago, I began to pretend that I was in love with one girl, while in fact, I did it only to secretly meet with her mother. Don't start judging me yet – if you could have seen her you would have understood – she is so hot! But now her husband found out about our secret affair and, it seems he seriously wants to, well, kill me. No, I am not kidding. About ten months ago, I met an extraordinarily beautiful girl. Her name was Julia, and we were studying at the same university, although she was a couple of years younger than me. I can’t find enough words to describe how strikingly beautiful Julia was. When she walked down the street, every guy turned their head to look at her. And it was obvious that a lot guys on our campus adored her, but I soon learned from Julia's acquaintances that she didn't have a boyfriend. And it seemed that she had never dated anybody. At the time I didn't think that there was anything strange about that and I just accepted the challenge!
Well, everything went down in a pretty ordinary way. I somehow found a reason to introduce myself to Julia. Then I invited her out and then asked her if she would like to become my girlfriend. Nothing really all that interesting. I consider myself a witty guy, and trust me — I know how to make people like me. So, I started dating a real beauty, but after a week I realized that my life couldn’t be this absolutely perfect. When I was only trying to get Julia’s attention, I noticed that she was the most closed-off introvert of all introverts that I have ever met in my entire life. But, as you might have guessed, I’m a big talker myself, so for some time, Julia’s silence didn’t really bother me at all. I didn't even feel offended when I realized that she wasn’t really paying attention to me at all and was just listening to something inside her own head. It was more annoying that she didn't allow anybody to touch her. Like, at all. Even when we went to watch a horror movie together, she wouldn't hold hands during the "boo!” moments. And trust me, I knowingly invited her to watch a movie with a lot of scary parts. I couldn’t even kiss her on the cheek, and when I tried to, Julia either frowned or didn’t react at all to what was happening. It was as if I was trying to kiss a very beautiful, but very cold, porcelain doll. If that makes any sense at all.
So after about a month in this relationship, I'd already started thinking about how to end it, when suddenly my girlfriend invited me to have dinner at her place. I was surprised. Up until then, I had never even walked her to her house. I lived on campus, and Julia drove a car – a present from her parents for her 18th birthday, so there was never a need to walk or drive her home. Her invitation seemed really strange to me, but I thought — maybe Julia simply came from a very conservative family? And maybe she needs to introduce me to her parents before she starts to behave like a normal girlfriend?
I agreed to go to Julia's home, and this is the turning point of my story. My girlfriend warned me that her father was working late and that we would be spending the evening with her mother. I'll call her mother, umm, Mrs. Crowley. I decided that it would be nice if she liked me. So I chose my most decent clothes, bought some flowers, and went to the pastry shop for a good cake. And at exactly the appointed time, I was standing in front of her door with the flowers in one hand and the cake in the other, like a good boy. And when the door opened, I suddenly saw a woman who was as strikingly beautiful as Julia was. I was even a little confused, to be honest. Mrs. Crowley met me very warmly, hugged me when I introduced myself, and immediately invited me ... no, not to the table, but to the living room. Instead of a dull “meeting my parents” kind of dinner, Mrs. Crowley suggested that we all watch a cool movie together.
Well, it was a pretty enjoyable evening. Even if Julia never left her state of suspended animation, but Mrs. Crowley turned out to be a very talkative and pleasant woman. She was eighteen years older than me – a huge difference, but it didn't really feel that way. Mrs. Crowley was exactly the same chatter-box type as I am. After we had a second cup of tea, Julia left us alone for a moment and Mrs. Crowley complained that she was incredibly tired of her housewife lifestyle. Then she added how she missed simply talking with someone as interesting as I was...
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